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The Tokyo Metropolitan Government conducted a survey of 5,000 men and women living in Tokyo regarding housework and childcare.
\nWith the cooperation of experts, we have unraveled the differences in awareness and true feelings between men and women regarding housework and childcare, as well as the reality of childcare. We will send you this report in three parts, along with a few words of advice that you can use starting today!<\/p>\n
The first issue will focus on the division of housework and childcare duties and the honest opinions of fathers and mothers.<\/p>\n
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![\"Tsuneko](\"\/hp\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/01\/pct-takaso01.png\")
<\/p>\nTsuneko Takaso<\/strong> Shintaro Yamaguchi<\/strong> eichiic acid<\/strong> While about 80% of dads<\/span> said they were satisfied with the division of housework and childcare<\/span>, a whopping half of moms were dissatisfied<\/span>. …… What is the cause of this gap?<\/p>\n About half of the fathers responded that they had no particular complaints. The next most common complaint was that they “complain or say no” when they do things. On the other hand, the number one complaint of moms was that “they don’t do what I tell them to<\/span> do. Even if the fathers do not have bad intentions, the situation<\/span> where “it is natural for the mothers to do it”<\/span> may be a source of frustration for the mothers.<\/p>\n <\/p>\n Keep in mind that “I want you to understand” will not get through to them<\/span>. To begin with, nearly 80% of fathers are satisfied with the current situation, so it can be said that they are unaware of the difficulties and problems that moms are going through. I hope that the results of this survey will make dads aware of the difficulties and problems moms are facing. I hope that the results of this survey will make dads aware of the difficulties they are facing. Let’s encourage moms to be proactive in expressing their thoughts and feelings to their<\/span> parents. It is best to say out loud what you want them to<\/span> do, rather than giving up when it is not possible!<\/p>\n <\/p>\n The idea of which one is the “primary” or “secondary” parent is different to begin with, isn’t it? For example, it may be an option for the family to divide roles, for example, “I am a full-time housewife (househusband), so I do more of the housework,” but it is important for both<\/span> parents to be aware that they should be the “master” of their own<\/span> lives. In terms of housework, if both of you are working full time, there is no such thing as “the wife is the master and the husband is the servant. It would be nice if they could think about “what to do next”<\/span> rather than asking for instructions to be given.<\/p>\n *Created based on feedback from moms and dads in the Fact-Finding Survey<\/p>\n <\/p>\n When both spouses are so full of time, energy, and energy, they have little time to appreciate each other’s good points. We often hear complaints about dads who “make you feel like you’ve done a great job just by doing a little,” and moms who “point out all the things you’re not doing even though you’re trying your best. Then, “I’m having a hard time too,” or “I’m having a much harder time than you are,” and it turns into a “hardship battle. What I would like you to do in such situations is to use ” I (I) messages<\/span>. Instead of “Why don’t you do it? Instead of “Why won’t you do something?”, try to communicate with the other person while respecting both yourself and the other person by putting yourself as the subject<\/span>.<\/p>\n<\/div>\n When asked how much time they and their partner spend together on housework and childcare, respondents tended to estimate their own time as much and their partner’s time as little<\/span>. The results revealed that the respondents do not have a firm grasp of their partner’s housework and childcare<\/span>.<\/p>\n <\/p>\n It is natural for us as human beings to not see well what others are doing<\/span>. Even in our world as researchers, if we were to take a survey and add up everyone’s work, 100% would not be enough (laugh). and then add up everyone’s percentage, 100% doesn’t really cut it (laughs). It would be nice if we could be tolerant of each other and recognize that the other is making efforts even when they are not visible<\/span>!<\/p>\n The “nameless chores” are the little chores that don’t have a specific name, but are essential to our lives. These “unnamed chores,” which may seem trivial at first glance, are said to lead to “burdens” and “dissatisfaction” in the home<\/span>.<\/p>\n <\/p>\n Taking out the trash” is a household chore without a name. If all you do is take the garbage to the collection point, it is called “taking out the garbage <\/span>. If dad is in charge of taking out the trash, he collects trash from each room, sorts it, knows which day of the week is trash day, and takes it out. He should also be able to set up and replenish garbage bags!<\/p>\n
\nChild Care Advisor, Career Consultant
\nDirector, NPO Fathering Japan
\nMother of 3 children
\nEmotionless Parenting” (Kanki Shuppan)<\/p>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n\n![\"Image](\"\/hp\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/01\/pct-yamaguchi01.png\")
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\nProfessor, Graduate School of Economics, The University of Tokyo
\nFather of 1 child
\nThe Economics of ‘Family Happiness'” (Kobunsha Shinsho),
\nThe Economics of Child Rearing Support,” Nippon Hyoronsha, Inc.<\/p>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\nA funny “Aru Aru” cartoon about housework and childcare<\/h4>\n
\n\n![\"Eiichi's](\"\/hp\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/01\/pct-eiichi.png\")
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\nillustrator
\nFather of 1 child
\nParenting cartoon series on the Tokyo Metropolitan Government’s website “TEAM Housework & Childcare”.
\nSkinhead Dad’s Childcare Diary” (Nikkei BP)<\/p>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\nTell us! Moms’ and Dads’ honest opinions and dissatisfaction<\/h4>\n
(1) Housework and childcare sharing, satisfied fathers and bewildered mothers<\/h5>\n
Q. Are you satisfied with the division of housework and childcare between husband and wife?<\/h6>\n
![\"Are](\"\/hp\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/01\/tokyo-vol1-graph01.png\")
<\/a><\/p>\n(2) Moms’ honest feeling is, “I want you to do it without telling me.<\/h5>\n
Q. What are your dissatisfactions with your spouse?<\/h6>\n
![\"Figure](\"\/hp\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/01\/tokyo-vol1-graph02.png\")
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\n![\"Tsuneko](\"\/hp\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/01\/pct-takaso03.png\")
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\n![\"Image](\"\/hp\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/01\/pct-yamaguchi03.png\")
<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n![\"Images](\"https:\/\/team-kaji-ikuji.metro.tokyo.lg.jp\/hp\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/01\/tokyo-vol1-senryu-1.png\")
<\/a><\/p>\n![\"Tsuneko](\"\/hp\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/01\/pct-takaso02.png\")
\u3000Avoid the “battle of wits” and use “eye messages” to convey your message.<\/h7><\/p>\n\n![\"Manga](\"\/hp\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/01\/tokyo-vol1-manga1-3.png\")
![\"Manga](\"\/hp\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/01\/tokyo-vol1-manga1-4.png\")
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![\"Manga](\"\/hp\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/01\/tokyo-vol1-manga1-2.png\")
<\/div>\n<\/div>\n2. where is the dissatisfaction coming from? So much invisible burden!<\/h4>\n
(1) “I think I’m doing it,” but it’s just piling up and turning into a ditch! Big gap in perception between men and women<\/h5>\n
Q. How much time do you and your partner spend on housework and childcare?<\/h6>\n
![\"Graph](\"\/hp\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/01\/tokyo-vol1-graph03.png\")
<\/a><\/p>\n\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n(2) Invisible Burden: “Unnamed Household Tasks” Hidden in Everyday Life<\/h5>\n
\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\nQ. “Housework with no name”: Who does this chore most often, you or your spouse?<\/h6>\n
![\"Who](\"\/hp\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/01\/tokyo-vol1-graph04.png\")
<\/a><\/p>\n![\"Manga](\"\/hp\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/01\/tokyo-vol1-manga2-3.png\")
![\"Manga](\"\/hp\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/01\/tokyo-vol1-manga2-4.png\")
<\/div>\n![\"Manga](\"\/hp\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/01\/tokyo-vol1-manga2-1.png\")
![\"Manga](\"\/hp\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/01\/tokyo-vol1-manga2-2.png\")
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