Table of Contents

• Parenting manga “Dads evolve through childcare!”
• Ask a Senior Childcare Dad! Real voices and advice on returning to work

Parenting manga “Dads evolve through childcare!”

Profile
Eiichi
After working for a design company in Tokyo, he became a freelance illustrator. He is a hard-working father who creates animation, manga, and illustrations, including winning the Yubari International Fantastic Film Festival’s International Short Film Showcase Division Excellence in Animation Award.

Ask a Senior Childcare Dad! Real voices and advice on returning to work

　We interviewed three senior fathers about their anxieties and difficulties in returning to work after childcare, and how they overcame them.

　For fathers who will be raising children or are considering raising children, please also see the article here↓!

No. 43: Support for “child-rearing” fathers! Advice from senior fathers for pre-dads

Ask a Senior Childcare Dad! Real voices and advice on returning to work

Senior dads we talked to.

Mr. A: Father of three children (ages 6, 4, and 0). He works full time and his wife is a housewife. 4 weeks of childcare work on two separate occasions when their third child was born.

Mr. B: Father of two children (ages 7 and 3). He and his wife both work full time and have experienced childcare for less than 2 months to 3 months on a total of 3 occasions.

Mr. C: Father of one child (1 year old). He works full time and his wife works shorter hours. 6 months of childcare experience.

What were your concerns about returning to work? And how did you really feel when you returned to work?

• There wasn’t much precedent for male childcare, so I was concerned about what people thought of me in the workplace.

[In fact…] My bosses and coworkers viewed me favorably. After taking childcare, people around me began to see me as someone who prioritizes family, which made it easier for me to balance work and family.

He was also able to set a good precedent by having other men follow his lead and take childcare leave.

• Because the job was running without me during my childcare, I was worried that I was losing my significance and that I didn’t have a place in the workplace.

In fact…] Although I was able to get the job done without myself, I no longer felt that I had to do it, and I was able to entrust my subordinates and coworkers with the job with peace of mind. I was able to reaffirm my new raison d’etre (i.e., the position of nurturing subordinates and taking over their work).

• I had a hard time with housework and childcare while I was in childcare, but now that I’m back at work and have even less time, I’m not sure if I’ll be able to keep the household running…

In reality…] It was difficult when I first returned to work, but with the help of my parents, I gradually became accustomed to it. I was dealing with my child almost 24 hours a day during childcare, but since returning to work, I have found a rhythm and a sense of balance in my life and have been able to maintain my physical and mental health.

What are some good things you did before returning to work?

[Work side].

I was talking to a good colleague about how things were going at work.

Before I started childcare, I made a PowerPoint presentation to illustrate the flow of work and concretely explain how I should respond to each case. I did this so that I would not have to worry about my absence during childcare, but it was also useful for smooth information sharing with my colleagues after I returned to work.

Household chores and childcare

I have had a thorough discussion with my wife about the division of roles and daily schedule after my return to work.

During the time he was in childcare, he was able to do a full range of housework and childcare that he had previously left to his wife. After returning to work, I no longer have to worry about being a one-person operation when my wife is not available.

He has also made his household chores more efficient. A full line of time-saving appliances, such as a washer/dryer and electronic pressure cooker, were installed and mastered in their use.

In order to reduce the burden of bedtime and nighttime support after returning to work, I gave my child practice in sleeping on his/her own (so-called “nenne training”).

I researched about leave systems at work (e.g., nursing leave) and government services (e.g., childcare for sick children) that can be used in case of emergencies.

We took our children to public childcare centers and other places to familiarize them with people and places they did not know.

Other

・Review of insurance and household finances in connection with the addition of a family member.

During the week, the family made memories by going to theme parks and other places that would be crowded on weekends, on weekdays during childcare!

What are the roles of the couple after returning to work?

• Example of Mr. A (wife is a housewife)

Dads: Take care of the children in the morning and get them ready for school, take care of them before bed (bath, change clothes, brush teeth, etc.),

Mom: general housekeeping, care of children during the day

• Example of Mr. B (wife also works full time)

Dad: drop-off/pick-up at daycare, cleaning, washing dishes, cooking (half), laundry (half)

Mothers: Putting children to bed, bathing, cooking (half), laundry (half)

• Example of Mr. C (wife works shorter hours)

Dad: drop off at daycare, care for kids in the morning and before bed, laundry, dishes, cleaning (half), cooking (sub)

Mom: picking up children from daycare, taking care of children after evening, cooking (main), cleaning (half), tending the garden

C

Example of a weekday schedule for Mr. C

What were some of the challenges you faced after returning to work? How did you overcome them?

[Case 1

My child got sick and I had to take days off work. Work did not progress, colleagues had to work harder, and the child cried at night, making it difficult to sleep… It was tough on both the body and mind.

＜The seniors overcame the problem in this way! >

Whenever I felt something was wrong with my child’s health (runny nose, slight fever, etc.), I took him to the hospital as soon as possible. This has significantly reduced the number of cases of prolonged illness.

I will not be able to help myself if I have a hole in my work schedule! Instead, when a colleague is in a similar situation, actively support them & gladly send them on their way.

Always be ready to share information with your colleagues so that you can hand over your work to them at any time.

When it is difficult for both myself and my wife to pick up the child, we ask one of our parents to pick up the child. In order to be able to ask for help in an emergency, I try to communicate closely with my parents about the child’s physical condition and their schedules.

I listened to other people with similar problems and watched videos on childcare to relieve anxiety and stress.

[Case 2

Busy with work, housework, and childcare, and stressed because I couldn’t take time for myself.

＜The seniors overcame the problem in this way! >

While doing household chores, you can listen to your favorite TV or music to refresh yourself.

…I decided to take the plunge at night and go to bed early with my kids. Instead, I woke up early in the morning to devote 30 minutes to my hobbies.

The company’s employees spend their weekday lunch breaks and commuting time reading as a hobby.

I took turns with my wife on our days off and made time to go out alone with the kids. This created time for both of them to spend on their own!

Message to fathers who are about to return to work

(Ms. A ) Before returning to work, I had a lot of worries, but when I finally returned to work, I realized that most of my worries were just too much to worry about. It is easier to have a baby than to worry about it. I am sure there will be hardships, but nothing is harder than a mother’s childbirth. Mom risked her life, so I hope you will do the same!

(Ms. B ) I think you will enjoy childcare and housework if you are aware that you are taking the initiative rather than “helping” with them!

(Ms. C ) The end of childcare work does not mean the end of your child-rearing career; child-rearing will continue even after you return to work. You have a long road ahead of you, so please take it easy at work and at home, and don’t hesitate to rely on those who can help you. If you smile and say “thank you” a lot, people around you will be willing to help you, and I am sure you will feel good about yourself and enjoy your days to the fullest!